I have this memory that always comes back and gives me negative feelings. What do I do?
First, remember that the past already happened. It's unchangeable. The only thing you can do is learn from it. To do things better in the future. If you decide you can learn something from a past situation, take a fixed amount of time for this on purpose and close the case afterwards.
Second, remember that you only have control over your own actions. You don't control other people, you only control how you respond.
Third, remember that people think more about their own mistakes than the mistakes of others. Think of yourself. What mistakes do you think more about?
And finally, remember that practicing mindfulness means practicing to notice these recurring thoughts earlier. You practice letting go of thoughts easier. With time, this gives you more peace of mind. And more peace from your past.
“Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why it is called the present.” – Alice Morse Earle
Reading Recommendations
Freedom from Repetitive Thoughts - Jack Kornfield
If you read one thing about mindfulness this week: read this. Jack explains how we can let go of repetitive thoughts by focusing not only on the thought itself, but also on your feelings in mind and body.
The Brain Mechanics of Rumination and Repetitive Thinking | Psychology Today
A new study from Stanford University helps explain the neuroscience of rumination and repetitive thinking.
Hamilton et al did a meta-analysis of previous research and identified that depressive ruminations are more likely to emerge when the firing and increased cerebral blood flow to a specific region of the cerebrum called the subgenual prefrontal cortex (sgPFC) synchronizes with the default mode network (DMN).
Write code that is easy to delete, not easy to extend
“Every line of code is written without reason, maintained out of weakness, and deleted by chance” Jean-Paul Sartre’s Programming in ANSI C
Weekly Mindfulness Practice
Smile to yourself in the mirror. Try this out today. Repeat it every morning this week.
Smiling has so many positive benefits on your mind and body. It releases endorphins and reduces stress. This works even when you don't feel like smiling.
If it helps you to smile even brighter, try to think of someone or something that brings genuine joy into your life.
End note
When this was interesting to you, there might be someone you know who will also like this. Please consider forwarding this mail to that person.
Have a great week
Simon
PS: If you found an article you think others might like and that fits this newsletter, I’d love it if you write me an email.